Tailspin

The world as we knew it was promptly busted around 9:45 Friday morning. The results are in; I felt like someone punched me in the stomach and kicked me in the ribs while I was down and then pulled my hair just for fun.
It is stage IV metastatic breast cancer. What this means is, it is the same cancer as in the breast, it has moved to my lungs and 3 spots in some bones and ribs?? Not really sure of all the details because as soon as I heard treatable but not curable, I pretty much floated into a bubble and only heard tid bits of information. I now know how Charley Brown felt all those years – you are there, you know something is being said but you can’t for the life of you focus, listen and hear.

We are looking into MD Anderson to see if there is a clinical trial for me to be in and if not I will start chemo within 2 weeks. And within these 2 weeks I will need to go to day surgery again to get a port. Eric still has many questions as to the treatment(s) so we still aren’t sure what exactly is going to be happening. I do know this, it is going to be a long road, it is going to be hard but it is all going to be worth every second of the hard work to get to live this wonderful life with my hubby, Ian, family and friends.

I can’t thank everyone enough for the loving emails, texts and voicemails. I am not ready to talk about this yet and honestly, I am not sure I ever will be. To me it is what it is, we are going to do what needs to be done and our “normal” life will now just be a different level of normal.