Sunday, March 7, 2010

Patience:

An ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay: to have patience with a slow learner.
I have been thinking a lot about this word lately – mainly because my days are filled to brim with patience when dealing with Ian. He wants to do EVERYTHING on his own, but there are a few small problems with this: it takes him FOREVER to complete the task at hand, even if he has no idea how to do something – he still won’t let me help me, and as with many things in life – it would be so much easier if I did it myself, but that isn’t the point of him doing it himself – he wants to do it to prove to himself and to me that yes, he is capable of accomplishing the task at hand. So as I sit with him, bite my tongue and sometimes have to sit on my hands for them not to spontaneously help him, I can’t help to think to myself – why can’t I be more patient with myself??
There are so many things I want to accomplish, but if I KNOW that Ian can’t learn something overnight, and I KNOW that most things on my to-do list can’t happen overnight either – then why do I beat myself up when the plan doesn’t happen just as I have it imagined in mind and why do I give up when it doesn’t go as planned? Why can’t I be patient with myself, not get restless or annoyed with myself and know, that tomorrow will bring a new day with new chances for me to get it right? I don’t know, but I am working on it….one step at a time and patiently (hopefully!)
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