Sunday, June 23, 2013

Can I get off this merry go-round now??


I feel like I am on a merry go-round…all the time – up and down, round and round, up and down, round and round…forever going on…I just want off for a little bit…but then I wonder – what would happen if I did get off?

Aren’t we all on a merry go-round – isn’t that life??

I had to go back to the ER on Friday because my whole right side went numb and this time I had a twitch added to it – a twitch in my right upper leg that would not stop, probably lasted 3 hours total and finally stopped when they gave me an IV steroid and muscle relaxer.

When I first called my radiation doctor to see what they wanted me to do, he said ER because he was afraid it might be a stroke.  But I was 99% sure it wasn’t and it was just brain swelling again, but I wasn’t going to be 100% until I had a CT scan.

SO the ER was a total cluster. The admin lady…well, let’s just say IF I were having a stroke, well, I am not sure how that would have turned out.  After WAY TOO long in my opinion, she got me checked in.  I GUESS she could tell by my speech and ability to smile I wasn’t having a stroke...but it still took a LONG time.

Got back, talked to the same ER dr who had to tell me the first time that it was a tumor (yes he remembered me), got blood drawn, IV hooked up, then a trauma came in, so I had to wait another 30 minutes or so until my other RN got there and then she came in and gave me my medication – I finally stopped shaking and calmed down due to medication.
Got my CT scan – all was clear!!

So this was all caused from the swelling, so I am back on steroids…lovely!

I am completely worn down…I think the radiation is taking full effect now…hence the swelling again.
I have slept on and off most of the day Saturday and today and am still tired. I am tired of being tired, but oh well…it is what it is at this point.

I kind of sort of had Eric shaved my head this morning…my hair is really falling out and it hurts and it is just easier with it so short…so be it.
We leave this week to go up to Eric’s family lake house in MI and I so looking forward to that!

Here is to keepin’ on keepin’ on.
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