After the crap ass day yesterday, today has turned out to be beautiful! I woke up rested and still pretty loopy from all that medicine yesterday, BUT I didn’t feel sick to my stomach at all and that f-ing cough was gone! My hands and feet had an odd tingling feeling in them this morning but have since gone away. No muscle or joint pain either. She said that could set in about 24 – 48 hours after the treatment so I am really hoping with it not in the first 24 hours, it won’t at all!
I don’t have much of an appetite. Honestly, I am so ready to be able to eat again. It is hard being hungry but the thought of food grossing you out. I am eating some instant wonton soup though – odd, I know. Not something I would eat in my “normal” life. Oh, how I do miss my normal life. When I start to think of my normal life, I have to remind myself, this is my life for the time being and if I look to the past to my other life, it won’t do me any good with where I am now right here and now. It is hard though – I so want to be able to take care of Ian like I used to, I don’t want to have to depend on Eric as much as I need to, I want to go run and get sweaty – I know I said I was fine with pilates, yoga and thai chi – which I am, but man alive, I want to go get a sweat on like nothing else right now. With that being said, Eric and I have decided after all my treatments are done and surgery is over, we are going to train for a ½ marathon – there I said it, I put it out there so now we have to do it! I am so excited for us to start running together again. When we first meet, that is how we really got to know one another – running the trail at townlake 3 times a week and talking. Now, it is going to take me some time before I am able to run and talk again, but I will get there and I can’t wait!
I live with stage IV metastatic breast cancer that has caused 3 brain surgeries and leukemia that required a bone marrow transplant. . I like to write about life - and I don't hold back! My mission is to always remind myself and others anything is possible,
2 comments:
I'm impressed with the running and talking! And I'm so glad you're feeling better. Hugs and love and lots of prayers coming your way!
First of all, I'm sorry about this and it bites, no other way to put it.
Second, I feel like some sort of stalker out here reading about your life and you not knowing that I am reading it ... so, now I am coming clean. I, Angie Utz, am some sort of cyber-looker on'er.... but now you know I am here and I think about you and pray for you and your family.
Third, Way to go; deciding to run a half marathon. I ran the Jacksonville, FL; Breast Cancer Half Marathon 02/2008; .... that is an awesome race with lots of support and vendors... it is the same time(ish) every year... so maybe you and I can meet up there in 2010!
I wish I had some awesome words of wisdom or encouragement, but I can't think of any; you are such a strong person and I admire your honesty in this blog . . . I think if you continue to "call it like you see it"; that it will keep you in the right mindset.
You are over the hump; less than 40% to go!
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