Would be unheard of a month ago and ever more so a year ago (well, before I was pregnant). I have always envied those who are able to do Pilates, yoga or tai chi and enjoy it and receive the mind/body benefits of these various exercises. But I was never one of those people for one reason and one reason alone – the stupid rate heart monitor I bought about 5 years ago and the need to see a super high calorie burn displayed after a 45 minute workout.
Now, don’t get me wrong, it isn’t like I really ever got back into shape after Ian – I couldn’t find the time and when I did, I would push too hard and usually hurt myself sidelining me for another week or so. But, there was a time that I could truly call myself a runner and I loved every sweaty, heart pumping minute of it. I also allowed myself to do yoga, but it wasn’t relaxing yoga it was ashtanga yoga (think of doing a series of movements and holding those movements until every muscle in you body is shaking) or bikram yoga (think a room over 100 degrees and sweating more than you ever knew you could sweat) – WOW, I really loved these but I never left either of these classes feeling more connect with my mind and body. I loved to sweat and in my mind, the more sweat, the more calories burned.
Well, to say the least, I don’t have the energy to do these types of exercises right now but I have found the beauty and peace of slowing down my exercise routine. Over the past week, I have been doing either Pilates or tai chi in the mornings and oh my goodness, I am LOVING it! Now, it isn’t the same kind of love I had/have (I don’t know if I still have that love) for a 45 minute workout that left me so sweaty I had to sit on a towel to drive home. It is a peaceful, taking care of my body love that when I get done I feel the energy in body verses needing to sit and recover for 10 minutes before moving on.
I think with me enjoying these new exercises, this is my first true lesson and understanding how to slow down. Eric and I were talking the other night and really, we need both need to learn slow down for ourselves and our family. It seems like we are always on the go, always looking to our calendars weeks in advance making plans here and there and with all these plans already made, it is hard to stay in the moment and soak up every little detail and enjoy the hell out it. Instead, we are looking at our watches and thinking about what we need to do next in order to make it to the following planed event.
It is hard to realize that I can’t do everything but when I think about it, I really don’t want to do everything. There are going to be events over the next few months that I or we miss and I am going to be okay with it.
I am not real sure how this started out talking about exercise and ended up talking about our calendar – but it did and instead of editing it to make complete since, I am leaving it how it is and reminding myself along the way, I am not perfect nor do I want to be!