Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Just life

I say just life, but it is really so much more that “just life”

I went to see Dr. H this morning and I got a little lecture…not big – believe me, I have had a BIG lecture from her a few times!
I really feel like she is my sister.  Just like Rachele, Dr. H is well studied, organized, has a crazy busy life and holds it all together. That is great for them.
I, on the other hand, sometimes don’t hold it all together…or even close.  Even BC (before cancer), I would overcommit, run on fumes and melt.  Yes, just like a toddler when needs a nap, I meltdown…still do to this day. I have been known to cry or just lay in bed until I pull it together.
Dr. H knows what all I do in my day-to-day life. I tell her everything – about the book, Etsy, guest blog post for Livestrong, my mission to teach the world to love…my ups and downs – she knows it all.

But in all this, she worries about me.  She has seen me at my top of tops and lowest of lows.  She has held my hands too many times when bad news has to be delivered or she knows outside help is needed.

She gently reminded me today, it isn’t on me to single handedly deliver my message.

It isn’t on me to show the world how brave and strong I am.
It isn’t on me to be the face of breast cancer.
I don’t have act like I am always fine.

For today, I was great. I pray to be great tomorrow and everyday after. But I guess she gave me permission to give myself a break...that I have earned it.

With that, I am not going to feel like I HAVE to post everyday this month. I know what I am sharing will be there tomorrow, next month, next years…it will be here for me to do.

And it doesn’t have to be yesterday.
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