Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Stage 4 breast cancer: takes 30 year old beautiful woman

I keep asking myself if it will ever be  easier for me to except what stage four cancer can and does do to a body...a young and otherwise healthy body.

I think at some point through this "journey" I have felt more powerful then the cancer and then the next day I feel like an ant about to be squashed to death by an unknowing foot.

I feel like living with Stage 4 cancer is like playing frogger on a daily basis...will something unseen hurt me today?

While I have the days, I make to-do lists so don't get too caught up in the game I play in my head.

My daily to-do list: believe my prayers,make my thinking hopeful, do my cancer blasting meditations, and much more. But the thing is, I know others do this too....and they are no longer here with us on earth.

So then I am left to ask myself "why does this work on my body and not other bodies?" 

I just don't know. 

A beautiful 30 year old was taken from her earthly home. 


Amber you were as sweet as one comes. You made a difference in the lives you touched and I am sure so many others who you never met. You my dear will be missed by many, and I thank you for  all the love and help you spread while you were here.

Friday, November 13, 2015

Stage 4 Breast Cancer; "Renee In Cancerland" reading

First off, if you are wondering why my post titles are the same for each reading, I have been listening to tips on how to show up on Goggle searches...we will try!

Today I am reading the chapter "Fish out of water" telling you more about my life living with stage 4 breast cancer.


Let me know your thoughts on the whole reading thing...are you liking it??

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

"I wasn't expecting that" by James Lawson

First off, let me say this post might be a tearjerker...and I don't mean it to be, BUT this is my life...our life here in Cancerland living as a #Lifer and the lives of our loved ones.

Listen first then continue reading (I don't mean to be bossy)


I think this is life...not just as a #Lifer in Cancerland, but life.  We are never expecting "that" whatever that might be.

When I met Eric, I wasn't expecting to fall in love with him. When I had Ian, I wasn't expecting my heart to grow 100x and Ian's presence filling it with magical love. When I heard I had cancer that first time, I wasn't expecting the fight that filled me up, and the fight I had inside of me. When it came back as Stage 4 Breast Cancer, I wasn't expecting that...AT ALL. When it moved to my brain, three times, I sure as hell wasn't expecting that. When Eric and mom had to will be to get out of bed, to get back in the game of life, I wasn't expecting that. When I relearned to walk, drive and live again...I wasn't expecting that.

When I found a group of friends who all have Stage 4 Breast Cancer who I couldn't get through this with out, I wasn't expecting that. 

Some of the best things in life have been things that in no way I was expecting.

Friday, November 6, 2015

Book about Stage 4 Breast Cancer

Welcome!
I hope y'all are enjoying me reading my book about living with Stage 4 Breast Cancer called "Renee In Cancerland" as much as I am enjoying reading it to you.  I hope you can hear ALL my emotions in it.



Have a great weekend and remember I will be posting more readings every Monday and Friday.


Tuesday, November 3, 2015

My voice

My hand shook when I was searching for the publish button on Monday.
  
It is scary to put your writing out into the world, but for me it is scarier to put my actual voice out into the world.

This is something I have felt my heart telling me to do you for a long time. And I have learned that when my heart tells me to do something it was pretty serious, and it won't stop poking at me until I do it… I guess a lot like me?!?!

Here is the intro to my book "Renee in Cancerland on audio with me reading it.


I am so excited about this and I hope you enjoy it as well.

If you know others that would enjoy this also I'm asking you to please share as I have seen some miraculous things happen from people sharing YouTube videos, and I wonder what if I asked also what might happen?

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Halloween Fun

I am not even going to rehash the last three Halloween's because I'm sure you all know I was dealing with brain surgery stuff and the aftereffects.

Since our kids were 3, there has been a group of us in the neighborhood who get together on Halloween: the parents might a special "punch", the kids run around together and then we do a piƱata before we all go trick-or-treating. 
Eric and I were the first one to host and it has really become a part of our tradition around here.

Gina took it over for three years and this year she had a lot on her plate and I said give it back to me...I've got this! When I send the invite out, I said a little prayer and just wanted to feel good so we could do this thing!

Abd do this thing we did!






My mom stayed with Ian while Eric and I went with another friend to party hop around our neighborhood…which I have not done in years. I don't feel good today,
but last night was so worth it!